"You 'feckin' catastrophe."
REVIEW
Would I read it again? Yes No Maybe
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SUMMARY
This is Book Two in the Ruinous Love Trilogy. Book One recap be found here.
MAIN CHARACTERS
Lark - best friends with Sloane (Blackbird). Was sexually assaulted by a teacher as a teenager. After Sloane handled the situation, she decided she wasn’t going to rely on others to protect her, that she could do it herself. When her boyfriend of two years cheats on her, she ties fireworks to his crotch and lights up the sky. When she realizes she feels no remorse, she decides to take out some predators. But don’t call her a serial killer…she’s a multiple deleter.
Lachlan - Oldest Kane brother. He works for a man named Leander, who found the boys in Ireland shortly after they killed their dad. He brought them to the US and helped set them up a life here. Gave Lachlan a job, as a contract killer/cleaner/whatever Leander wants him to do. He also owns a leather shop where he makes shit out of leather.
Rowan/Butcher - Middle brother of the Kanes. From Ireland. Lachlan and Rowan killed their dad after years of abuse. After helping kill his dad, he realized he really didn’t feel badly, so might as well kill the killers! Is a chef, owns a restaurant in Boston.
Sloane/Blackbird - After being sexually assaulted as a teenager, and finding out her best friend, Lark, was also sexually assaulted by the same teacher, she decides to take matters into her own hands and murders him. After finding out, she didn’t feel badly about it, she decides to start taking out the scum of the earth. Her thing is taking their eyeballs. She also weaves a complicated web behind her victims to try and tell the cops where their victims are, but the cops are clueless.
Fionn - The youngest Kane brother. He is a doctor who lives not in Boston with everyone else. He is more of a free spirit and gets a lot of shit from his brothers for it.
Rose - Fionn’s “friend”. She has a broken leg, uses her crutches as a weapon, but also carries a huge ass knife. She works for the circus and is really funny/slightly crazy.
A year before Rowan’s new restaurant Butcher and Blackbird opened, Lark had been deleting a child predator. But accidents happen, and she needs some assistance. She calls her stepdad (I believe her family is in the mafia..or something similar to that, it's never exactly said but appears so) and says she needs help. He calls a friend (who we find out was Leander) and Lachlan gets sent to help. Lachlan wears a mask and tries to use a deep Batman voice. Lark is wearing Harley Quinn makeup (it's Halloween!). They annoy each other. Lachlan calls her Blunder Barbie and she calls him Budget Batman. Lachlan assumes that what happened was an accident, and Lark is just a spoiled princess who has no remorse. She needs a ride but he says she can’t be seen in his car, so he throws in the truck. She’s extremely claustrophobic and ends up breaking out of the trunk and getting away. Remember how her stepdad is like in the mafia? Yeah, he wasn’t too happy to find out that his daughter got thrown into a truck. So Leander is punishing Lachlan by giving him shitty jobs and not letting him “retire”.
On the night of the restaurant opening, they are instantly attracted to each other, not knowing who they are. When they realize it, they are both pissed off at each other. Sloane kept trying to get them to get along - by asking Lachlan to help Lark move. By asking Lachlan to dance with Lark at Sloane’s wedding.
Right before Sloane and Rowan’s wedding, Lark finds out that someone has been targeting her family and her mom and stepdad believe it to be Lachlan. Due to the whole Leander is mad and Lachlan is being punished situation. They decide that the solution is to kill Lachlan and probably just for good measure, go ahead and kill Rowan too. Lark is like absolutely not because that will devastate Sloane.
Lark’s aunt, Ethel, who is fabulous, insinuates to Lark that the best way to keep everyone safe is for Lark to marry Lachlan. Because her family would not kill someone that Lark loves.
At the wedding, Lark tells Lachlan what is going on and the plan. And he’s like ….but I don’t even like you and now I have to marry you? When Lark tells him that it will keep Rowan safe too, then he agrees.
Lark also says she will make sure Leander gets her family's accounts back and in return, she wants Lachlan to be retired. But she also wants access to all the databases that Leander has access to so she can figure out who is really targeting her family.
Things happen ….
Lachlan gives her a delayed wedding present. The principal of the school that Lark and Sloane went to. He did NOTHING about the allegations against the teacher. Lachlan finds him and lets Lark delete him and then he takes care of the body.
They start liking each other…very slowly. She gives him a present of a remote…to use whilst he is watching her sing at a concert…the remote controls something that Lark is wearing…
Lachlan owns a leather shop, some dude named Abe comes in, has a job for Lachlan. But he is giving off “ick” vibes. Lark comes in and interrupts their meeting.
Lachlan and Lark finally admit their feelings for each other. They were instantly attracted to each other but the whole truck situation kind of soured their relationship. Over time, Lark was able to forgive him, and they learned to like each other…and then love each other.
Ethel is dying, in hospice. But she doesn’t die from whatever ails her. She dies when someone comes in and injects medication into her IV.
When Lark’s mom calls to tell her about Ethel, she’s home alone. She calls Lachlan at work, he offers to come and get her, but she says she’ll take an Uber and meet him there. Unfortunately for Lark, she will not be making it. Abe is standing in her living room.
Lachlan realizes she is missing when she doesn’t show up at the nursing home and she isn’t answering her phone. It takes a bit, and it's a good thing Lachlan has some connections, but they manage to figure out that Abe’s real name is Abe Mead. Mead…as in Harvey Mead. The guy that Rowan literally beat to death in the first book. Abe found out that Rowan killed his brother so he decided he was going to ruin their entire family.
They find Lark and she is locked in a batch oven. Abe tells Lachlan that he can either save Lark or he can save Rowan because he put a bomb in his car and he can set it off with his phone. Lark makes the decision for him quickly and says to save Rowan, because Sloane is in the car too. Abe starts the oven and Lachlan freaks the fuck out. Luckily for everyone, Lachlan had brought along Rose too (Fionn is back at their apartment trying to save their dog that Abe injured), Rose sneaks in and shoots Abe. Rose and Lachlan manage to get the oven door open before it cooks Lark.
In the last chapter, Lachlan gives Lark a very early Christmas present. Some of it’s weird…the heart of the principal she killed. The other is divorce papers. Now we are all like WTF, they were getting along, being in love. Lachlan tells her that he knows their marriage didn’t start off as something either one of them wanted, so he wants to give her the option to leave or just to start their relationship over. She gets real upset, rightfully so, and is like I love you dumbass don’t ever give me divorce papers again. They go on their honeymoon in the bonus chapter…and she punishes him for those papers. It involves something really big…glittery…black…that straps on…